First responders solve real problems. First-world responders solve first world problems.
Co-written with Jefferson Bergey, featuring Erik Yates on guitar and vocals for this performance (12/9, Point Richmond CA). Lyrics below the vid!
We’re your first-world responders
We will pack your bowl
We will fetch more ice
When your drink is not so cold
As long as your problems
Are petty and small
We’re your first-world responders
We’re at your beck and call
I just can’t find a yoga outfit that fits
Reception on my cell phone sucks at this Ritz
My streaming movies aren’t loading
What is ‘buffer’?!?!
Don’t try to say I don’t know what it’s like to suffer
We’re your first-world responders
We will pack your bowl
We will fetch more ice
When your drink is not so cold
As long as your problems
Are petty and small
We’re your first-world responders
We’re at your beck and call
I can’t find parking in the Whole Foods parking lot
I just can’t take a decent nap on this yacht
Why do the waiters always have to be so rude
Each time I tell them I’m allergic to food
We’re your first-world responders
We will pack your bowl
We will fetch more ice
When your drink is not so cold
As long as your problems
Are petty and small
We’re your first-world responders
We’re at your beck and call
Where is the fire?
There is no fire
It only exists in your mind
We’re your first-world responders
We will pack your bowl
We will fetch more ice
When your drink is not so cold
As long as your problems
Are petty and small
We’re your first-world responders
We’re at your beck and call
